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Honey and Lance
This showed up in my FB stream like 5 times in the last 24 hours. Pretty cool, kinda funny, lots of stars. How the f**ck did they get Sting in this thing? And Lenny? Also, who is Gilles Marini and should I be investigating him? See for yourself. © Copyright 2009, Reckless...
7 Kickass Sex Blogs You Should Be Reading
Welcome you smarmy perverts! I’ve been checking out some of the best sex and kink blogs around (shocker, I know) and I’m here to present to you Lance’s favorite 7 sex blogs. These blogs consistently bring me enjoyment, sometimes give me a chubby, often cause me to laugh, and almost...
I Investigated Big Brothers Big Sisters
Like I said I would in my last post on mentorship, I investigated the Big Brothers Big Sisters program in Orlando. It seems fairly easy to get into. You have to be at least age 21, fill out a 9 page application and be a solid citizen. They do all...
Mentoring Will Change Your Life. Also, Don’t Be Selfish
There are a few stretches in my life where I wish I had the influence of a strong and positive mentoring figure. I hate playing the what-if game–what-if I had done this instead of that, would I have a better job/relationship/life now?–but I do think that having good mentors can...
Spurred by Honey’s comment about anal sex on our guest post, Spanking for Beginners, I thought I would try to address why I like it. I’ve done a ton of thinking on the topic of pooper sex and why it’s such a big deal and why it works and doesn’t...
This Is The Best Movie I’ve Seen In A Year: Strickly Sexual
Saw a link to this amazing indie film somewhere today, I watched the whole thing on Hulu.com. I was super skeptical at first and normally I hate watching movies online, but this flick is awesome. Super funny, well acted, genuine emotions, realistic look at weird relationships. The sex is hot...
The Frisky
Forget Trophy Wives, Try A Trophy Husband
Since creation, man has been an entity unto himself and woman has been his counterpart. First, God made man; then he made him a girlfriend. Men are the protagonists of our children’s stories, the majority of our doctors, generals and CEOs, the... ...
Ask The Astrosexologist: Can This Gemini/Virgo Couple Find A Way To Get Along?
I am a Gemini and my boyfriend is a Virgo. We’ve been dating for about a year and a half, but we seem to butt heads ALL the time, over the smallest and the most ridiculous things that get completely blown out of proportion. We just cannot seem to... ...
Love Vandal: Edgy Heart, Sweet Message
Reader Nina snapped these outside a supermarket in Bochum, Germany. She translated the message as, “Love is there for everyone” and said, “The heart is edgy, but the message is sweet.” So true! Have you seen graffiti that’s kind of sweet (even if... ...
Get All Your Fashion Tweets In One Place
Twitter has become a bit overwhelming. Everyone and their mother (yes, mothers, including Brad Goreski’s mom) are on the social media platform, tweeting away about their daily plans. It’s pretty easy to miss exciting news or random interesting... ...
Hey Doc, I’ve had your book for five years now. First, I want to say that every single word in it is true. I’ve seen your coaching work time and again. It’s the best $100 I’ve ever spent. However, I think I may be one of those guys who just can’t... ...
Style Buzz: Adam Lambert’s Man Makeup & A $1.5 Million Dress
Adam Lambert is allegedly in talks to develop a line of makeup for girls and, he thinks, boys who are super curious about eyeliner, nail polish and body glitter. Finally. [The Cut] Taking a trip? Stock up on these fancy schmancy travel-sized... ...
Dating
Well, what can I say about eHarmony? They are one of the premiere dating sites, and for a good reason. I signed up for a full membership, tried it out, and all I can say is they really get down to the nitty gritty as far as what you would...
I rate this site so highly because not only can you comfortably find singles online with a web browser, but you can find them when your away from your computer with your cell phone! Very nice! New singles are joining all the time, and Love.Dada has around 3 million members. It...
Real Mature Singles is a screened group of single adults who are ready to move beyond online dating and into something real....
If you're 30-ish, or way over it, then you may be looking for a more serious relationship. I think this is one reason why more single women and men seem to find Thirty Plus Singles so successful! This site has lots of no-nonsense dating features, it also has strict rules imposed...
Elite Matchmaking for Professional Singles VIP Singles is a true matchmaking service. They assign a personal representative to you. This person reviews the profile that you submit to them, and from there, start suggesting matches. These are hand picked, and human scrutinized results. It really doesn't get much better than this! The...
Our members are intelligent, attractive professionals in search of meaningful relationships. We have walked away impressed with the Seeking Marriage site. Not only to they cater to a very well defined set of people, looking for serious relationships, but they do so with a great deal of personal attention. Once you fill...
The Reverse Cowgirl
I've started a new blog. You can read it here. Adjust your bookmarks accordingly....
They Shoot Porn Stars, Don't They?
Today marks the debut of "They Shoot Porn Stars, Don't They?," a text-and-photo essay about the adult movie industry and the recession.Originally, I wrote it for a publication, but I subsequently pulled it. When no other publication expressed an interest in publishing it, I decided to self-publish it.The site was...
I'm going to take a break from blogging for a while. If you would like to follow my activities, you can do so by way of my Twitter....
Artist Molly Peck bid on and won my Significant Object story. This is a photo of the Significant Object at its new home. If stories are children looking for adoption, this one has a happy ending....
At 12:01 p.m., Special Agent Xerxes Xavier Jr., 34, begins to rise from behind his cluttered desk in his cramped and overcrowded office inside the J. Edgar Hoover Building at 935 Pennsylvania Avenue, pushing the metal chair away from himself, and the green vinyl seat cushion lets out a thin...
If you've read this blog before, you know that I wrote a story for Significant Objects. Created by my friend Rob Walker and Joshua Glenn, the project seeks to find out exactly how we construct value. Writers, such as the one whose words you are reading now, are asked if...
Ellie Lumpesse: A Pretentious Pervert
Fascinating Reads – March 12, 2010
NY Subway Ad Campaign Tells Women "Abortion Changes You"March 12, 2010 © Ellie for Ellie Lumpesse: A Pretentious Pervert, 2010. | Permalink | No comment | Add to del.icio.us Post tags: Feed enhanced by Better Feed from Ozh...
© Ellie for Ellie Lumpesse: A Pretentious Pervert, 2010. | Permalink | No comment | Add to del.icio.us Post tags: Feed enhanced by Better Feed from Ozh...
Fascinating Reads – March 11, 2010
Feminists Calling Out Misandry When They See ItMarch 4, 2010 © Ellie for Ellie Lumpesse: A Pretentious Pervert, 2010. | Permalink | No comment | Add to del.icio.us Post tags: Feed enhanced by Better Feed from Ozh...
Fascinating Reads – March 10, 2010
If you’re a sex worker who likes her career, and if you talkMarch 8, 2010 © Ellie for Ellie Lumpesse: A Pretentious Pervert, 2010. | Permalink | No comment | Add to del.icio.us Post tags: Feed enhanced by Better Feed from Ozh...
“Would it help if I touched your boobs?”
I don’t remember the exact context of the first time that Mr. Vanilla said this to me. I just remember that, as with subsequent utterances, it has produced significant comic relief. It has become tradition now that whenever I complain about anything (an ache or pain, too many papers to grade,...
3 Things I Learned From Being Poly
Engaging in successful poly relationships is definitely a challenge. I don’t think I knew just how much I had learned from them until I was happily back entrenched in monogamy. So, here are the things I’ve learned from being poly that I will carry with me for my entire life. 1....
About.com Sexuality
A recent study in the journal Sociology of Religion looks at American's beliefs about divine intervention in their daily lives. Based on two large surveys of Americans (one of which was nationally representative) the paper reports on how much or little people believe God is involved and influencing the...
CNBC Confuses Porn Actors With Little Children
It wasn't their intention, I'm sure, but this obnoxious and condescending CNBC piece about porn actors retiring reads like a special interest story about 6-year-old Timmy who got is very own bank account. Who could have imagined that porn actors do things like think about their careers, invest...
The mind may be our greatest sexual organ, but without the heart, our sex lives, just like the rest of our lives, wouldn't exist. Until you, or someone you're having sex with, has a heart attack or is diagnosed with heart disease, you probably won't think too much about the...
Tipping the Scales on Sex Addiction
Since the DSM working group began announcing their proposals for new sexual diagnoses, I've been slowly making my way through the research that their proposals are based on, trying to glean some idea of how they arrived at what sometimes seem like fantastical proposals for the next twenty years of...
What's Casual About Casual Sex?
My friend and colleague Heather Corinna (founder of Scarleteen and sex educator extraordinaire) is doing a large survey on multi-generational experiences with and attitudes about casual sex. Heather is simply one of the smartest sex people I know, and every conversation I have with her could go on for...
Audacia Ray from Sex Work Awareness (and elsewhere) shared with me this smart and simple research project, funded by the Association for Progressive Communications. The project is attempting to get an idea of the state of access to sexuality information in U.S. public libraries. From the project website: We...
aag
The ignition had hardly fired when my daughter started yelling, “Mommy! Turn it up!” It’s her favorite song; I complied despite the exceedingly dim view I take of the artist. We listened in silence (the little ones have co-opted their sister’s musical tastes) until it was over, then I tossed out...
FuckingMachines and a Spray Hose
This photo and video set from FuckingMachines.com has completely destroyed my productivity. It cannot be put off. I’m going to have to take a short (or, er, not so short) Hitachi break. Check out the clips, then join me? More clips here, zomg. ------ This post, FuckingMachines and a Spray Hose, originally appeared on...
“Ready to start in on the painting?” he asked, but instead of answering I pushed him onto the couch. For once I took his cock by surprise; usually our dates are organized, scheduled and timed so excruciatingly well that he’s hard on cue as he knocks on the door. This time...
After a February so packed with work I hardly slept and the deposit of a juicy tax-refund check, my bank groaned under the unaccustomed weight of excess dollars. My mind raced with plans for them: Saving, heading off property tax payments, investing in the upkeep of my home. Now, just one...
Someone watching closely might have noticed that the hair dryer was pointed toward her blond curls at most half the time. But at seven o’clock at night on the floor outside the bathroom, no one was around but my middle child’s siblings, and for once they were uncharacteristically quiet, the eldest...
Almost exactly four years ago the combination of heavy spring rains and my sump pump’s untimely demise lead to the spontaneous generation of a river below my living room. This might have been nice (Consider the soothing babble of water! The dewy humidity! The bathing options!) but for the fact that...
Sex In The Public Square - Comments
In reply to Hypermedicalization Disorder: Thank you so much for writing this! What concerns me the most is the idea that clinicians are "demanding" that we diagnose this as a mental disorder. First, I know Very Few clinicians that think more medicalization is better. Secondly, it scares me that...
Emerald, you are more than wlecome
In reply to Emerald and Pink Floyd: No More Turning Away (on International Sex Worker Rights Day): So now we can both be grateful. I'm grateful that you are out there doing what you do, and that you are so generous with your thoughts as to be willing to let me...
In reply to Emerald and Pink Floyd: No More Turning Away (on International Sex Worker Rights Day): Elizabeth, I almost fell over just now when I came here and saw this post. I really don't know how to tell you how honored I feel that you mentioned it here. Thank you.How interesting...
Really tawdry stuff, but interesting legal note
In reply to Who's Sorry Now?: Gloria Allred has gotten in on the act: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ymEke7zK_I0 I really don't know what the full nature of her clients case against Woods, and he may very well have behaved very badly in that relationship, but since when is caddish behavior like cheating on a...
In reply to Who's Sorry Now?: It follows a long history of apologizing for being caught and self-humbling to the point that no-one wants to beat you up for it any more because it's no fun.Swaggart, the Bakers, Clinton, Spitzer. It's a way of confessing post discovery to minimize financial and...
In reply to Graffiti Gone Wild: Attention grabber and to the point...
Bound, Not Gagged
Comment: Feminist Review Post on The Little Black Book of Grisélidis Réal
Below I’ve included a comment I threw together on the Feminist Review’s post on The Little Black Book of Grisélidis Réal, a newly released translation of Réal’s work log and interviews with journalist Jean-Luc Hennig, translated by Ariana Reines. I would suggest reading FR’s “review.” The Little Black Book is just...
2 months ago, I was robbed in my home/incall by a man who demanded his money back BEFORE the sexual activity, and also got away with $250 more of mine AFTER I pepper sprayed him in the face three times. This was the SECOND time that I had been robbed...
Desiree Alliance In conjunction with BAYSWAN, Best Practices Policy Project (BPPP), Center for Sex and Culture (CSC), International Sex Worker Foundation for Art, Culture and Education (ISWFACE), St. James Infirmary, SWOP USA, SWOP Tucson, SWOP LV, SWOP Chicago, SWOP NorCal, SWOP Santa Cruz, Harm Reduction Coalition, Sex Work Awareness, and $pread...
forwarded on behalf of Maxine Doogan Who: Host Maxine Doogan of the Erotic Service Providers Union will be joined by Douglas Fox of the International Sex Workers Union who will be updating listeners on the Crime Bill which criminalize clients of prostitutes. Susan Davis of Canada’s West Coast Cooperative of...
Adult Industry Professional Self-Defense Program
Back Off! and SWOP Chicago join forces to present the Adult Industry Self-Defense program. This class consists of a 2-hour module that will cover the specific needs of the adult industry. it addresses general self-defense strategies and deals with environmental self-defense, including ejecting a client. Offered in a private setting....
One thing I’ve noticed again and again is that when men make online comments in any way supporting sex workers (like on news articles or major blogs), they always hasten to add that they have never seen a sex worker and have no need of it. Obviously, they believe client-stereotypes...
YourTango | The Latest Smart Talk About Love
How Do I Talk About Marriage With My Man?
Dr. John Gray shares how to broach the sensitive topic of marriage with a man.Keywords: advice, Educational, engagement, how-to, john, marriage, proposal, relationship, talk, tipsBookmark/Share this post with: read more...
5 Celeb Couples We Wish We Could Forget
We know there's no explaining attraction, and we know that love is blind, but all of the platitudes in the world can't excuse the train wreck that is a tinsel town mismatchKeywords: alex rodriguez, Angelina Jolie, britney spears, celebrity, celebrity couple, Kevin Federline, Madonna, Nicole Richie, Paris HiltonBookmark/Share this post...
The Links: Cutting To The Chase
Cabbages And Condoms. A confession from the other woman. Getting a guy to hit on you. Being caught in the friend zone... as a woman. Being a boyfriend without benefits. Stress-level and male attraction. Dealing with post-divorce depression. Hearing about something very kinky on the first date. Is monogamy hardwired...
50 Ways To Be Romantic Right Now
So you want to do something romantic for your beloved, but you're stumped for ideas. Whether you want a romantic gesture that's creative, outrageous, affordable, quick or classic, we've got the answer.Keywords: boyfriend, date, dates, Dating, Engaged, fun, girlfriend, love, romance, romantic, sex, takenBookmark/Share this post with: ...
Zoe Saldana Loves Sex, Can't Live Without It
Zoe Saldana tells the April issue of Essence magazine that she really likes having sex, which does not surprise us at all, as she's young, gorgeous, and, as we saw in Center Stage, very flexible. Keywords: avatar, celeb love, celebrity relationships, Glamour magazine, sex, Star TrekBookmark/Share this post with: ...
How To Tell What A Guy Likes In Bed
John Gray helps a woman figure out what her guy likes in bed with talking about it.Keywords: advice, attraction, communication, heart, john, mind, sex, soul, tenderness, tipsBookmark/Share this post with: read more...
Stiletto Diaries™
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I Hope You Like These. It Took Me A VERY Long Time To Open The Package.
Ugh, I hate how my period makes me moody and extra sensitive. Perhaps the pinky-purple daisies (in the photo above) that Aiden brought me on Tuesday were a preventative measure. You know, so that I wouldn’t rip his face off at the most minuscule of provocations. I loathe women who use their cycle as...
Why Do Walruses Go To Tupperware Parties?
I wish I had something fantastic to write, but last week was primarily spent doing my best to get over a sinus/chest cold, which I have now passed on to Aiden it seems. Jack was away on business during the end of the week, and spent the weekend in Banff...
Good Morning! While I normally harbor an unnatural love of Mondays, on this particular morning I am fighting a sinus/chest infection or something of that nature and so am not as peppy and upbeat as usual. I did have a lovely weekend, however, and so that makes up for the fact that I’ve run...
There Is A Land Called Passive Aggressia, And I Am Their Queen
It has taken a number of days for the household to recover from my mother’s visit, but I think things are pretty much back to the way we like them around here. She and I had ONE rather explosive argument, that began with the laundry and ended with our respective shortcomings as...
I Know It’s Difficult To Hear With Your Head Up Your Ass
72 hours to go. Somehow it seems shorter when I think of it in hours, rather than days. My mum and I are still getting along just fine, but between you and me, I’m ready for her to go home. It’s not that she has done anything terrible, it’s just that her...
Practical Polyamory™
Mo'Nique's Open Marriage Admission Spawns Wider Coverage
It's very exciting to see what is happening in the media and online as a result of Mo'Nique's admission that she and husband Sidney have an open relationship. Here's my friend Jenny Block, author of Open: Love, Sex and Life in an Open Marriage, in a Dallas TV interview on the subject...
Mo'Nique Tells It Like It Is About Her Open Marriage
Here's the clip where you will hear exactly what Mo'Nique had to say about her open marriage in her interview with Barbara Walters aired last night. You can mouse-over the bottom portion of the video and use the slider bar to move ahead to the pertinent part, which is between...
Another Award-Winning Actress Declares Hers an Open Marriage
Thanks to Practical Polyamory reader Renee for this tip. Actress Mo'Nique, who is nominated to win an academy award Sunday evening for her role as an abusive mother in the oscar-nominated film Precious, has said in her segment of Barbara Walters' oscar special that she and her husband of 25 years,...
Poly Presentation March 21, Washington Area Secular Humanists, Tyson's Corner, VA
I'm looking forward to talking polyamory with the Washington Area Secular Humanists on March 21, 2010 at from 2:00 - 5:00 p.m. at the Tyson's-Pimmitt Public Library. Hope you can join us! Here are the details of the program, which will especially focus on the ethics of polyamory and using...
Finding our Own Edge and Setting Personal Boundaries
This is by no means a full treatment of this subject, only a few thoughts to share. This past weekend I taught a new class on Compersion during which I said that when it comes to determining our own boundaries in the context of polyamorous relationships, most of us don't have a societal model to...
Calling all Polyamorous Spokespeople, Activists, Community Leaders, and Out & Proud Polys!
Ever more news reports, articles, and television shows are highlighting poly families, and a surprisingly large number of them are showing us very favorably!Ever wondered how those people got chosen when, perhaps, your family would have been perfect? Ever been interviewed yourself and watched or read it later and thought,...
Susie Bright's Journal
Did You Lie About Reading THAT Book?
The unsinkable Michelle Kerns has just written a story about the "Top Ten Books People Lie About Reading." It also quotes a recent British study about the authors whom readers really DO gobble up, regardless of their claims. Let's play, shall we? I'll list the "Top 10 False Brags" and......
Tell Me Your Sex Story! -- In Bed Listeners @Audible.com Spill the Beans
My New Podcast This Week @Audible_com: • Get ready to meet your fellow In Bed devotees! Regular listener "Lucy" and I talk about her intimate, personal sex acts, first orgasm with a man, fantasies, and anal sex— plus what she's learned about sex from working at a bar— and on......
Susie Interviews Sex Ed Genius Cory Silverberg @Audible.com— Lock Up Your Daughters!
My New Podcast This Week @Audible_com: I interview About.com's Cory Silverberg, the author of The Ultimate Guide to Sex and Disability, a man who had revolutionized the way we talk about sex today. I asked Cory to come talk with me about everything he doesn't get asked on the usual......
An Educated Man: Jamie Gillis, RIP
My friend Jamie Gillis died last Friday after a long struggle with cancer. He was an actor and legend in the sex film business whom I've written about over the years the way most movie critics write about Meryl Streep. They broke the mold with this guy. Gillis grew up......
It's Getting Near Dawn, Valentine...
01 Sunshine of Your Love It's getting near dawn, When lights close their tired eyes. I'll soon be with you my love, To give you my dawn surprise. I'll be with you darling soon, I'll be with you when the stars start falling. I've been waiting so long To be......
Secret Stuff About Valentine's Day... No Foolin'!
What makes Valentine's Day special? It's a pre-Christian Holiday with such a dramatic history you can't help but throb and weep! Here's a glimpse from one of my favorite books, Extraordinary Origins of Everyday Things: The Catholic Church’s attempt to paper over a popular pagan fertility rite with the clubbing......
Waking Vixen » Blog
Sex Nerds and Oversharers: Your Contribution to Important Sexuality Research is Needed!
I have always thought that research on sexuality is cool. Plus, having engaged in various kinds of research on sex, its presence (it being sex research, not actual sex) in my life allows me to make lots of puns (actual sex provides plenty of opportunities for punning as well). But...
Love and Pain at Sex Worker Literati
This upcoming Thursday, February 4th is the “Love and Pain” edition of Sex Worker Literati. We’ve got a great line-up (below) that will be a complex mix of brevity and misery – we like to keep things complicated. And, I’m totally getting better at posting video on the regular. Above is...
Video: Go-go boys, tentacle porn, and sex worker stories
More video from Sex Worker Literati in September! The first is Gerry Visco, who describes herself as “illegally blonde” and writes about outrageous NYC nightlife at the New York Press. Gerry’s not just a chronicler of nightlife, she’s also a creator of mayhem. You can see what I mean in the...
Sex Worker Literati: Stories on Video & Call for Performers
I’ve been a bit lax about it over the past two months, partly due to some hard drive messiness (le sigh), but I spend some time this weekend digging into my archives of video files from Sex Worker Literati. There are a lot of good stories coming down the pike, since...
Neither Victims Nor Voiceless (crosspost from RH Reality Check)
Yesterday I had my first feature go up at RH Reality Check, and it’s about sex work activism, the ways that the sex worker rights movement is sometimes misconstrued by the feminist movement, and it has some substantive writing on my time in India. Plus, there’s a bit about the...
Laurenn McCubbin: Shaking it Up in Sin City (artfully, of course)
I am 90% happy that I am not in Las Vegas this week at the Adult Entertainment Expo. I do not miss the endless walking and leg ache of the convention hall, I do not miss the inevitable reminder that most of the porn industry isn’t at all like the...
Hitchedmag.com
Four St. Patrick’s Day dates that could get you lucky....
Recession-Proofing Your Marriage
How couples can ensure survival during volatile times....
6 Ways to Create a Strong and Healthy Marriage
Use these tips to create a strong and prosperous marriage....
David pours his sweat and vision into their new business AlteArte....
Overcoming Personal Fears in Marriage
Why fear (particularly from a job loss) should never dictate the positive forces in your marriage....
7 simple steps to creating an evolving keepsake that’ll keep friends and family up to date....